Sunday, September 1, 2013

37 Weeks

Us at Brooklyn Botanical Garden.I am 37 weeks into my pregnancy today. The baby is considered to be full term now, although I would prefer it to stay in for at least another two weeks.

By Botanical Garden.All is going well. I feel fine and don’t have any major issues. I am not sure if my varicose veins are getting worse, but if they are, it’s a slow process. I do feel more tired, but it’s only natural, so no complaints here. When humidity is high, it gets a little harder to breathe, but luckily this summer is relatively nice. I think when I was pregnant with Arosha, average temperature and humidity were higher. Of course, I did not have to spend as much time outside as I do now, so the last few weeks of pregnancy were easier to handle.

Unit #1.I still think I’ll gain less weight this time around. So far I am up around 20-22 lbs, and with Arosha I gained 35 lbs. I hope it’ll be a little easier to loose them after birth.

37 weeks.I did not really had any cravings in the beginning of the pregnancy, but now for some unknown reason I am tempted to eat something sweet every day. I try not to give in, but often eat a small ice-cream or a few candies on a daily basis. Makes me feel a bit guilty, but the craving is so strong, and I don’t think my diet should be as strict as in the first two trimesters, so…

Botanical Garden.I can feel the baby hiccuping every day now. I think this started a week or two ago. It’s cute. She also is quite an active baby, and I feel her moving pretty often, especially at night. Her movements feel a bit different than Arosha’s. I guess, a lot depends on the position of placenta, of the baby, etc, etc. By the way, when I went for a sonogram at around 35 weeks, her weight estimate placed her in the 32nd percentile. I remember that with Arosha he was always around 50th. Wonder if she’ll indeed be smaller.

Us.We are still not 100% set on the name. Maybe when we’ll actually see her, it’ll become more clear.

Favorite past-time — book reading.Arosha still sleeps in the room with us, and he really likes it. We have decided that when the baby will arrive, we’ll keep this arrangement, and instead of the crib, she’ll sleep in the portable play yard, which we bought a while ago for travel purposes. I don’t know how well this will work — I guess, a lot will depend on the amount of newborn crying and Arosha’s tolerance for it — but hopefully everyone will be happy. As I mentioned, part of the reason is that Arosha really loves sleeping in the same room with us, and I don’t want him to feel that his little sister took his place; another part of it is that Arosha sleeps better when he is with us. I am actually getting more sleep ever since he moved in — instead of 7 a.m. he usually gets up after 8.

Running.So I am pretty sure that in a few weeks we’ll see our little girl. I am in no rush, since the first few months with Arosha were probably the hardest time in my life, but it’ll be nice to stop being pregnant if for no other reason than getting back superior bladder control.

Vika and Ignat.P.S. The pictures here are from the last week. We went to Botanical Garden with Vika, Ignat and Alisa, and had such a great time!
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Sunday, September 8, 2013

Weekend

Throgs Neck Bridge.We’re trying to use our last pre-baby weekends to their full potential. Yesterday Alena and I spent our full day alone without Aroshka. Aroshka was with his grandparents while we did our now weekly OBGYN visit, did some errands that we won’t be able to do when the baby comes and finished the day off with a nice dinner at our favorite Thai place in Park Slope.

38 weeks and 2 days.Today I had an urge to explore a new place — the park under and around Throgs Neck Bridge. I drive by this place every day when I go to work and somehow never stopped there before. So we got into our car and drove there along with my dad. I spent some time taking long exposure shots, while Arosha spent all this time throwing stones into the water.

Throgs Neck.We also installed a new infant car seat base into our car and a car seat that we use for travel into my dad’s car. He’s going to be taking Aroshka to gymnastics every Tuesday now — first class is in two days. Meanwhile Alena is into her 39th week which means that we can have a new arrival any day now.

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Friday, September 13, 2013

39 Weeks

Baby closet.Roughly a week is left until my due date. It’s getting harder and harder physically — my lower back hurts, I have cramps in my stomach, especially at the end of the day, and two fingers on my right hand hurt day and night (a few nights ago I even cried for a bit at 5 in the morning, because they hurt so bad and I could not fall asleep).

But it’s not my body’s state I want to write about, but rather the emotions that are running on high waves inside me.

I remember feeling anxious and excited before Arosha’s arrival. First time parents. Clueless. Now I think I have much greater anxiety building up.

I know all the babies are different, but the first few months with Arosha were just so hard, that I am worried about being able to adequately take care of two children at the same time.

How will the breastfeeding go? Is she going to want to spend hours and hours on my breast as Arosha did? Will she sleep OK or I am going to have to constantly hold her and not sleep for hours at night trying to make her fall asleep? How will Arosha react to the sharp decrease of attention that I can give him? He is such a mommy’s boy, and it will break my heart if he will become one unhappy toddler because of the new situation.

Danya’s mom helped us a lot, but she is not getting any younger, and I think her job has become more stressful and her commute is longer now. I know she’ll do what she can, but with Arosha in the picture, there is more to do this time around, so it makes things even harder.

I know Danya will help, but he works full time, and drives a lot, so he will need his sleep just as he did last time.

Danya’s dad will help too. I know he could not do much with a newborn, but now any time he’ll be able to spend with Arosha will help tremendously. I am so happy that he does not mind driving Arosha to gymnastics class every Tuesday. Arosha seems to enjoy this activity, and was asking me when he’ll go back a few times already.
My mom might come sometime in November, but we don’t even know if she’ll get a visa, so nothing is certain at this point.

I am also worried about feeling blue after giving birth. It was the case with Arosha, and I so don’t want to experience the hormonal and sleep deprivation induced downs. I am a pretty happy person over all, and feeling sad and anxious and guilty and angry is something I am not looking forward to. Maybe it’ll be different this time around, who knows.

So here I am. Waiting for our little girl’s arrival with hope and excitement, but also with a lot of worry. I know everything comes in stages and eventually I’ll get a hold on being a mother of two, but for now I can honestly say that I am a bit scared. I guess that’s normal though.
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